Afraid to email your readers? How to write emails without feeling spammy

Authors, why are you afraid to email your readers? Philip Duncan has a few theories plus tips for overcoming fear and connecting with readers. 

Affiliate Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links, which means if you click on them and make a purchase, I will receive a small commission (at no extra charge to you).

In addition to his work as an email marketing specialist, Philip Duncan is an award-winning and best-selling self-published author. His debut novel, Blood Ties, won the gold medal for military thrillers at the 2022 Global Book Awards for Self-Publishing. Philip’s passion for writing translates to his work helping authors build and grow their email lists in ways that help them establish meaningful connections with their ideal readers. Register here for Philip’s free, live webinar training, “3 Secrets to Building an Email List That Actually Buys Your Books,” on Wednesday, August 20, at 2 p.m. ET.

Afraid to email your readers? How to write emails without feeling spammy

By Philip Duncan

If you’ve ever opened your email platform, stared at the blank screen, and thought, “What do I even say?,” you’re not alone.

And if your next thought was, “I don’t want to annoy anyone,” then hey, welcome to the club.

Most authors don’t struggle with writing emails. They struggle with feeling like a spammer. That fear of bugging readers keeps them frozen… and silent.

But silence doesn’t sell books. So, let’s fix that.

The real reason you’re afraid to email your readers

When authors say, “I don’t know what to write,” they usually mean something deeper.

• I don’t want to sound pushy.
• I don’t want people to unsubscribe.
• I don’t want to be “that person” who’s always selling.

Sound familiar?

This fear isn’t about lack of ideas. It’s about not wanting to lose trust. And that’s actually a good sign. It means you care about your readers.

So, let’s lean into that care and write emails that connect, rather than annoy.

You’re not a spammer (seriously)

Spammers don’t worry about being spammy. You do. That’s the difference.

You’re not some sketchy marketer blasting strangers. You’re an author with a story to share. And you have readers who actually asked to hear from you.

You’re not selling junk. You’re building a relationship. That’s not spam. That’s value.

Think connection, not promotion

You don’t need to be fancy, clever, or overly professional in your emails. You just need to be real.

Picture your favorite reader. Write like you’re talking to them over coffee.

Here’s what connection-driven emails often include:

• A personal story or behind-the-scenes moment
• An honest update about your writing or life
• A fun thing you discovered (a show, a book, a tip)
• A question that invites them to reply

Five simple email ideas that won’t make you cringe

Still afraid to email your readers? Here are five go-to prompts that work even when your brain feels like oatmeal:

1. Behind-the-scenes peek — Share a snapshot of your workspace, your current draft, or a deleted scene that didn’t make the cut.
   
2. A short story — Doesn’t have to be profound. Even a “you won’t believe what happened at the grocery store” tale works.
   
3. Ask for input — Cover designs, character names, book titles. Your readers love to feel involved.
   
4. Share a recommendation — A book, podcast, playlist, recipe. If it made you smile, it’ll probably make your reader smile too.
   
5. Life update — Something funny, weird, emotional, or unexpected that happened lately. Be human.

You don’t need to tie it back to your book every time. Just be present.

When in doubt, send this one line

Still frozen? Copy and paste this:

“What’s one book you think more people should read?”

That’s it.

It’s short. It’s warm. It gets replies. And often, one reader’s reply is all it takes to spark your next idea.

You don’t need perfect—you just need to show up

Here’s the truth: The emails that get opened, loved, and replied to aren’t always the polished, perfectly structured ones.

They’re the ones that sound like you.

So stop waiting for the perfect thing to say. Your readers don’t need a literary masterpiece. They just need to hear from you.

The imperfect email you send will always beat the perfect one you don’t.

FAQ: Quick answers to common email fears

How often should I email my list?

Once a week is a solid rhythm, but twice a month works too. Consistency is the key.

What if people unsubscribe?

Let them. It’s normal. Every unsubscribe brings you closer to the people who actually want to be there.

Can I sell in every email?

You can, but try not to. Follow the 80/20 rule: 80 percent value, 20 percent promo.

What’s the best time to send emails?

Test a few times and see what gets the best engagement. Mornings on weekdays often perform well, but it depends on your list.

How do I get people to reply?

Ask a real question. Keep it casual. For example:

“What’s one book you couldn’t put down this year?”

Still nervous? That’s OK. Being worried means you care. But don’t let it keep you quiet.

Your readers want to hear from you. And once you start showing up, email becomes a whole lot less scary—and a lot more fun.

If you haven’t started building an email list yet, what’s holding you back? Please tell us in a comment.